Please Note: For some, reading through these traits can be an uncomfortable exercise because it requires us to look at our own role in dysfunctional relationship patterns. But if we want our lives to change, we must begin by getting honest with ourselves. As you review the lists below, try to remember that each and every one of these traits originated as coping mechanisms—they are our best attempt to function in a world that can be incredibly painful and frightening at times. So for now, the goal is to simply grow in awareness of these tendencies.